So you have a girl’s number/contact info? Check. You have a girl who’s interested on the other end? Check. You have the ambition and wherewithal to move the interaction in the direction where you both want to go? Check. You’re all set to take action and make that first move, and throw down for the stuff you care about or the blossoming relationship that could be happening because you’re in contact with this new girl. But you’re wondering how to get a girl to message you back.
Have no fear though, because the internet was created as a compendium. A vast resource to help people who are looking for information but aren’t quite sure how to get to the place they’re trying to get to. We at LEVO Magazine are part of this compendium, so this article is your guide for how to get a girl to message you back.
4 steps for how to get a girl to message you back
When it comes to getting women to message you back, we’re essentially referring to preventing flaky behavior. Flaking is anything that happens in an interaction that stalls that forward momentum. You’re trying to meet up with her, she’s not showing up, you’re trying to message her, she’s not replying, when she sees you around town she avoids talking to you, etc… These sort of things are all considered flaking. The most basic form of not flaking is replying to the messages you send. Ideally, you’ll be messaging her to continue your interaction, go for the meet-up, that sort of thing. But if she never replies, you’re out of luck. Here are a few simple ways to help eliminate flaky messaging behavior.
1. When getting her number or other contact info, have a really good initial interaction
It’s funny because people usually don’t flake when they have something to lose. If your initial interaction with a girl was really good, then she’ll want to talk to you again. It’s that simple. If she wasn’t completely certain about you, and decided she didn’t want to pursue you and all of a sudden, you’re blowing up her phone – that’s an entirely different matter. So to make things as easy as possible for getting her to message you back, make sure you have a great initial interaction. Get her contact info based off an event the 2 of you would enjoy going to together, make sure your conversation has some unfinished threads which you can finish up later, and for the most part, pace your interaction into meeting up with her again.
2. Once you’ve gotten her contact info and start messaging, end with a question
Most things guys message girls don’t end with questions. Most things that guys message girls don’t always get replies from the women, usually because they don’t end with questions. The whole purpose of this it to gradually build up a compliance ladder so she starts to comply more and more, eventually leading to a meet-up. If you’re not messaging a question, you’re partially letting the interaction fizzle out. Don’t do this to yourself. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot before the interaction even starts. You owe it to yourself not to do this.
3. Keep your messages light and flirty
Women are much more willing to keep conversations going, via message, in person, or anywhere, if the tone is non-threatening and gives an overall sense of fun and well-being. If you’re able to do this, even in short bursts like messages, you’ll have a much easier time doing it in person. So, keep your conversations light and flirty. You’re much more likely to reply to someone who gives good news or brings fun times, and girls are the same way. Don’t get overly sexual, don’t bring up topics that are difficult to comprehend, keep things sweet and simple.
4. Don’t get too needy
I’ve heard of situations where guys will blow up girls’ phones 30+ times per day. This is ridiculous. The easiest way to get a girl to message you back is to make it seem like you’re busy doing better things with your time, and this will get her to invest emotionally and chase you. It’s just basic human nature, we usually want what we can’t have. If you’re coming across as too needy over message, you’re just giving her reasons to not reply instead of reasons to meet up with you.
And I know you don’t want to do that. Luckily for us, people mostly reciprocate, so unless you had a completely awful interaction that’s almost unrecoverable, you’re good to go. This is how to get a girl to message you back.